Tuesday, March 24, 2009

'Twas the night before surgery...

Practice wearing a head wrap

Hats off to you!

I'm helping pack, see?

I can't believe it!

" 'Twas the night before surgery, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;
The suitcase was packed and set on the chair,
In hopes that surgery time would soon be there;
AJ was nestled all snug in his bed,
While sounds of trains and planes danced in his head."

So here it is...the night before surgery. I have been thinking about what I'd want to write on this night. Imagining how I'd feel. How we'd feel.

Today has been an odd day. Almost as if I was going through the motions-like an out of body experience.

As I drove home, the rain began to sprinkle, with the sun coming and going at its own discretion. Reality suddenly hit. AJ's entire world is about to change. Just the fact that he will have the "equipment" to hear astounds me. AJ IS GOING TO HEAR. (Note: Repeat to self multiple times as needed)

The sun appearing and then disappearing during the rain reminded me of what this journey has been like. Not just AJ's journey to hear, but his ENTIRE journey up to this point. From the moment we stepped off the plane with AJ, it has been raining. Maybe off and on, maybe partly cloudy with a chance of showers, maybe torrential at times. But through it all, the sun has come out. Here and there, not always when we thought needed it, but when the big man upstairs knew we were drowning and desperately needed dry land.

AJ is no longer a blog of jello (thank you to my Mom for that description of him when we came walking up the terminal). Our little boy, is a little man. A toddler. Who may not be doing all of the "typical" things almost three year old little boys do...but he does show us his wit, smarts, stubborness, strength, and humor all in a day's fun. His smile and laugh are truly contagious. He is the very thing that keeps me going on the lowest of days...which is interesting to me, since most of those low days are in relation to something someone has told me he is "not doing."

I am so proud of him, I have no words to describe the pride that is filling my heart tonight. I wanted to create a few photo montages with pictures from his first referral picture all the way to the present. I soon realized that I needed to be functional for tomorrow and will save that emotional rollercoaster for another time. Just thinking about how far he's come makes me tear up. My little man made eye contact with me tonight and cracked his "flirty" smile at me, which he knows makes me laugh and sign to him.

Am I nervous for tomorrow? A little. I am more nervous about post-op than I am about anything else at this point. I know he will be in good hands during his surgery. It's the overnight stay and sensory reaction to the bandage on his head that worry me. Whatever comes, we'll just go with it. AJ will be a bionic boy. He will hear in one months time.


So here we are, t-minus 11 hours till surgery. Nothing left to do but wait for tomorrow's cool mist & awesome rainbow....


  1. I just got your email and I came right over to your blog...YIPEE!! I am truly excited for you. I totally remember that feeling the night before surgery. Neither my husband nor I could sleep.

    Good Luck tomorrow and remember how grateful little AJ will be one day for the decision you two made for him when he was too young to do so.

    Post-op will probably be rough, but it usually only lasts 1-3 days. Take advantage of all the cuddle time he may want to do with you! :)

    I wish we lived nearby to meet little AJ and bring him balloons tomorrow. We will be thinking of you and look forward to hearing the update.


  2. Best of luck on the surgery! My daughter and I have had both ears done for a total of 4 cochlear implant surgeries. Sitting in the waiting room is probably the hardest part, but children typically heal very quickly. My daughter didn't even take Tylenol after we left the hospital and was back at school in less than a week! She was 6 when she had her first ear done and almost 11 for the second. We hear so well now (after using hearing aids) that I'm grateful every single day. Please let me know if I can answer any questions and I hope you'll visit the HearingExchange blog and resource community!

  3. Dear AJ, it's Drama Vaney. I had a bit of a hard time this morning trying to pay attention knowing you were in surgery. Thank your Daddy for calling with update that all went well. Heal well and fast.
    I count each day until I see that bright shiny face again!!
    With much lo9ve for you, Momma & Daddy


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